Book Recommendation: „I’ll take care of Scotland“ by T. Shadowfoot

This book by an ununderstandably hitherto unknown author is a master piece. It tells the story of 5 friends, Chedo, Zewi, Zeke, Marvy, and Olbri – a pentagram of morally superior agents if you will-, who conspire to spoof the guardian candidates of two agents of the other faction whose guts they hate because they play the game so much better than them. These portals are located in Scotland, and since they cannot get there in person, and are too arrogant to try and find colleagues who could take down the portals, they decide that one of them, Chedo, should actually spoof, the others agree to level small accounts for the designated bot master to use.

Book Recommendation: „I’ll take care of Scotland“ by T. Shadowfoot weiterlesen

Pizza Trololo nicht mehr im Sortiment

Wir mussten leider die Pizza Trololo aus dem Sortiment nehmen. Sie wurde insgesamt sehr inkompetent zubereitet, stets nur halb belegt ausgeliefert (wenn überhaupt!) und dann irgendwo abgelegt, wo sie entweder überhaupt keinen Sinn oder nur Nutzen für Dritte hatte.
Dafür haben wir aber neu die Pizzen L1, Dusselmeister, AP-Diät und Hypocritus im Angebot. Mhhh, lecker! Einfach mal probieren…

Ingress phrases and their translations

Here’s some ingress code talk I turned into actual text. Because everywhere I found it so far, it was posted as an image. As far as I can tell, this is the original post: <https://plus.google.com/+AlfonsoMartinezdeLizarrondo/posts/a6TDyTo3nGW>, and the translations are to be attributed to Alfonso Martinez de Lizarrondo. But I might be wrong. Please let me know if you are the original author, and I will change the credits here (or if you are Alfonso, and don’t want me to credit you). I also added a few at the bottom.

What do they say What do they mean
Hello, How do I move? I’m a noob.
How do I submit a portal? I’m still a noob.
I have a new idea to improve game-play! I’ve been playing a little, but still a noob.
That is a valid portal according to the rule. That portal is in a restricted zone where one of our teammates can go whenever they want.
That portal is invalid because it’s not a public zone That portal is in a restricted zone where none of our teammates can go.
That’s a worthy portal because it’s a known meeting place. That’s the pub where I go to have drinks with my friends.
That’s not a worthy portal because it doesn’t have anything special. That’s a place where players ofthe other team usually meet.
That’s a special street art worth being a portal That’s some ugly graffiti that’s close to the home/workplace of one of our team members.
That portal should be removed because it’s just garbage- That’s a nice graffiti close to the home/workplace of one of the other team members.
This person is a great Ingress player. That’s a player from our team that picked the car at 2:00 AM to drive 1OOKm to destroy a new field.
That person has no life outside of Ingress. That’s a player from the other team that picked the car at 2:00 AM to drive 1OOKm to destroy a new field.
Let’s hope this field last for long. We’re covered by a field of our team.
Come on, we must destroy this field, we can’t play! We’re covered by a field of the other team.
This is a very dedicated player. A teammate is crushing the stats.
That one is obsessed with Ingress. An opposite team member is crushing the stats.
The game is imbalanced. We’re locally outnumbered.
Globally the game is balanced. We’re locally outnumbering the other team.
Niantic doesn’t care. There’s some bad action from a member of the opposite team.
Niantic doesn’t care. There’s some bad action from a member of our team.

Here’s some more I humbly add:

Spoofer’s are ruining the game. I am getting very worked up about someone else not actually walking around, instead of just playing the game involving imaginary triangles with no consequence for real life whatsoever.
Illegal gear sellers‘ messages in allcom make the game unplayable. I wanna complain so bad that I will find anything – A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G.!!!! – of which I can paint myself as a mistreated victim even though it doesn’t affect me one bit.
It’s immoral to kill guardian portals using a bot generated list. It’s immoral to kill guardian portals using a bot generated list. Unless: If it suits me, and a player X is a good friend of player Y, whom I hate. Then I am ethically obligated to use scraped data bases myself and doing that makes me a good person. After all I am just defending myself.
Look! I caught someone cheating!!! {insert some random, largely uninformative and evidence-free screenshots without pertinence whatsoever here}. I am really bad at Ingress so I don’t have much fun playing. Instead, I moonlight as an alarmist vigilante and wanna-be detective, smearing other people’s reputation without regard whether there is a good or bad explanation for what I think I’ve found (mostly what I found is actually nothing at all, but yolo!), and pretending to be an agitator having any kind of leverage stirring up a mob.
Please help the community by reporting this person: {insert some random, largely uninformative and evidence-free screenshots without pertinence whatsoever here}. They cheat and destroy the game. I am a drama queen or king and that person looked at me cross once, therefore I want to punish them and make them suffer, so that I feel better again! And I want all of mankind to take part in my drama!
Please help the community by reporting this person! The violated TOS because they said something mean to me. {insert some allcom screenshots that largely show that you started calling people names and the other party merely responded something to the effect of „shut up.“} I am a bully and do not appreciate people ignoring me.
I have a new idea to improve game-play! (ALT) I want to introduce a mechanism into Ingress that makes it impossible for anybody else to do something that I do not approve of, so that everything just works out in exactly the way that I, little self-entitled drunk-on-my-own-importance king that I am, wish.
I only play for fun, not to win. I still haven’t understood the game right even though I am already L15, and my team mates mislead me greatly about the mechanics of the game, but I want to give my erratic and senseless dabbling a nice sounding name.